I'm getting fat. So, so, so fat. Every bite I eat is another 10 pounds on my obese body. Every day is another chance to make it back to nothing. Part of me wants to be skinny. Part of me wants to disappear.
Sometimes I wonder if it's even about being thin. It's about how thin is the epitome of everything good. Once I'm skinny, everything else will fall into place. Part of me knows that I might never get there. Part of me knows that I'll always want to lose more. Still, there's a goal and I need to get there.
Hungry just feels good. In a world where I can accomplish nothing, at least I can accomplish not eating.